This week in Unstoppable is about stress management and resilience, two things I am all too comfortable with. It’s funny because just this week I was reflecting back on grade school and it must have been 7th or 8th grade and the teacher asked the question if anyone in the room didn’t experience stress. I remember raising my hand and telling the teacher that I didn’t because I didn’t know what “stress” means. I was telling this to my daughter who has her own issues dealing with different stresses and telling her that whether we understand the cause or not our lives are filled with stress. It is how we handle that stress that matters. I told her that there is no outcome from such a stress as a homework assignment or paper that we can’t get through together and that there is always tomorrow. The phrase I love to tell her, my apprentices and anyone stressing about something is “What’s the worst that can happen? will the world still be here? Will the birds still be chirping? then how bad could it be…”

These are words that I live by now. As with anyone else I have my good days and bad with stress. The important thing is that tomorrow always comes and quite often the tomorrow that comes often arrives with a bird outside my window chirping which brings a nice inner peace from whatever was bothering me the night before. Stress is a regular part of everyone’s life, how we manage it determines it’s effect on us. In this post I want to share a few stress management tips I have come up with.

Tips
1. Exercise
This is by far my #1 way I deal with stress these days. When things get overbearing and I can no longer breathe I go on a run. Quite often this run goes much further than previous ones or through a calming place around me but nevertheless I get out on the road and just listen to what God wants me to hear. I run at the pace that feels best given the situation, I take no breaks and just keep pushing through until an inner peace is found. This is my time to deal with the obstacle before me and I need time to process and think.
Another place I exercise my stress management is on the baseball field. Specifically, when I can get on the mound. When I am pitching I am not so much managing my stress but escaping it for a short time. When I step to the mound and face down at the batter my mind becomes solely focused on the game and the next pitch I am about to throw. I hear the world around me in terms of the game and outside stressors are not welcome until the game is over or I am off the mound. It is the one escape I have had. I suppose that is why I struggle so hard when I can’t take that place because of my shoulder.

2. Focus on Solutions
A great source of stress is situational and caused by the imminent decisions and actions we must take next. Many people react to these situation with emotion and compromise their mind by not focusing on the task at hand. This is what many have come to expect. When someone is able to put that emotion aside and react with focus, calm demeanor and find solutions they are called “cold”. There is nothing cold about this, some deal with stress differently but the stress doesn’t resolve until a solution is found. Sometimes that solution isn’t what we want if someone isn’t the cold one trying to find a better way out.

3. Express the Stress
If there is one thing here I am guilty of and could coach someone on in terms of stress management and what not to do it is hold everything in. Holding everything in is never the answer. This is where many are lucky to have a close friend can leverage them and tell them everything in your life. We need that opportunity to express the stress. When you don’t have that, when you aren’t comfortable telling anyone what you are going through you need to find another way. Having been in this dilemma without a friend I have found writing it out on paper can help. Just expressing what you are feeling through your own words. This doesn’t have to be in the form of a journal or something you keep but can even be destroyed the minute its complete. The idea is that you express it and get it out. Just like in talking with someone, writing it out gives you the opportunity to let the emotion out and deal with the feelings you have. Then just as with a friend it can be over and never mentioned again unless you need more time.

This already quite long so I will close with this thought on not managing stress well. Stress is never an accomplice or an excuse, stress doesn’t make us do anything. It is out choice how we let stress effect out lives, our attitudes and ultimately our outcomes. If things aren’t going the way you want it is an inner question to yourself that needs an answer of how can you change to achieve your dreams.